Community BBQ

Last evening we had what I pray will be the first of many "gatherings" for our church and the neighborhood around us. Do I think that it will all of a sudden get more people into our church? No. But it serves such a bigger purpose than that.

For one...we were able to feed the homeless around us pretty much all the hot dogs and hamburgers they wanted at that time. We offer aid and through Second Harvest have a brown Bag program for the seniors in our area...but don't have anything ongoing for the homeless...unless they manage to sneak into the church undetected and spend the night! But, it was a joy to see (from my vantage point from the bounce house)our congregation welcoming them, inviting them to sit at the tables, etc.

I also appreciated the time for us to just "be." A couple people commented there were a lot of people there they didn't know. It had to be the casual dress (shorts/t-shirts which CAN be worn to church...but most don't) because I recognized most of the people there...but the fact that in our small church of just under 200 there are those who don't at least recognize others made this a great event. I loved watching the people sitting at tables, sitting on the church steps, on the lawn, etc. talking and talking with those I don't see them speaking with on Sundays.

We had the BBQ because people see out church and yet really are not sure what we are. The office is around the corner and the church doors are only open on Sundays and even with the banner with out service time...people are not 100% positive if we are a church, museum or a funeral home!

Some people at our church cannot see the merit in this event. The great commission is for sure the " great suggestion" and that saddens me. I think it is a small minority...but enough to keep us a little stagnant and enough that there will be some real resistance as we continue the visioning process and begin to make changes.

Yesterday...

My meeting was postponed until 3 today...though I am trying to figure out why as I hear guitars from downstairs. It may be that this is the only time people going on the mission trip can get together to practice...or my SP has a lesson and this was the only time available. Either way...I have to come back this afternoon. Ugh! In other news...Rob is on his annual vacation with his family. They are in San Diego this year. I really miss him and usually I am ok with his being gone. But, I think with all that's going on, I could use him here! Anyway...back to the grindstone!

Update

Thank you so much for your prayers. I was still feeling quite nauseous all day...but was ready for "whatever." I had an idea of what was going to be said and new exactly what I needed to say even if the worst was to happen.

I think the worst might have happened if not for one thing...I pointed out (in front of a member of the Personnel Committee) that the last negative feedback I received was ELEVEN months ago...other than one other little blip (more personnel related (someone else) than how I am doing my job) there has been NOTHING. So, between that and Steve's admission of seeing a renewed energy in CM...they decided on probation until October and we will go from there.

The only thing I really have a problem with is a couple people (though I believe it was only 1) who went to Steve about VBS (negative) and yet were complimentary to my face day after day and not knowing specifics because Steve wouldn't give them to me...only generalities...and that it is expected that there be excitement surrounding CM. Problem...right now there is no area of the church where there is "excitement." Good stuff happening? Yuppers...a lot! But CM isn't the only ministry that doesn't have people lining up at the doors clamoring to get in!

So, Steve and I are going to meet Tuesday to set concrete goals and we'll see what happens!

I think I am being fired at 5 PM tonight when I come back for a meeting...I know it has taken longer than I expected/wanted to settle into my new role here...but it IS happening and it figures that they can't wait any longer. I wish they would just do it now rather than tonight and just get it over with!

The End of an Era????

I did something today that I hadn't planned...but felt right...at least for now. I took the majority of my youth ministry books (except for the ones I can still use in Children's Ministry)off my bookshelves at work and packed them in boxes. In their place are the books on Children's Ministry I own...I need to add the ones I bought at PDCM.

It feels right as I am sure I am staying put for awhile (either that or I am on my way out...but that is pure speculation on my part).

Marshmallow...the new puppy!! 

Wax Museum in SF 

Another View 

View from my camp site 

Quick Check-In

I need to get going with my morning...but wanted to update in case anyone is still reading this thing.

Camping was good...I'll post pix when I can. My day in San Fransico was pretty good.

*GROSS/TRIGGERING STUFF* I must have had some bad crab on the wharf or my one glass of wine didn't sit well with dinner or maybe because I ate 3 meals that day...but at 1:15 in the AM I awoke feeling ill...went back to sleep and 1/2 hour later I...well...you know. I have said this since I was 19 years old and I still hold to this: It is so much "better" when you do it yourself! If I had a gun held to my head and given the choice I would much prefer to stick my fingers down my throat then be sick and have no "control" over the situation!!! *END GROSS/TRIGGERING STUFF*

That being said...it has been TEN MONTHS since the last time I purged anyway!

Anyway...my mom was going to dinner with friends and a short time later she was brought home by one of them. My mom fell...flat on her face and managed to knock out one tooth (which the dummies didn't save...and supposedly one of the people there had "medical training"), break two or three others off, knock a bunch loose and cut her lip. Her friends told her she could put off doing anything until Monday!!! HELLO????!!!! I don't think so! So, we spent four hours in the ER and going to the 25 hour Walgreen's. She seemed ok when I left church, buit she says she is never leaving the house except for work, appointments and the store. Ugh!

Job Update

Just got an email from West Valley Pres. and they offered the position to someone else.

I'm bummed because I NEED OUT OF THIS HOUSE...but honestly, after VBS...it made me see how happy and content I am at Westminster (except for the no insurance and PT thing). As I told Rob last week or the week before...during VBS I FINALLY felt like I was a Director of Children's Ministries. Stuff just started clicking in my head and over the past week or so since VBS I have been planning my next plan of attack...going back over the CE Building and cleaning and redoing borders, etc. Oh...and really getting the Nursery/Toddler Room in shape.

Besides...after the I sent the first email to check on progress and didn't hear back, I pretty much figured that it was a no go.

Anyway...at least I finally heard back and can go camping and not have to think much about it.

A Break!

Next week I am taking off for a couple days and going camping! I still need to pick up a few items...but by and large I am ready to go. I spent a long time on the State Park web site and found available tent camping at one of the beaches a little over an hour away!

I told Rob I wouldn't be coming in next week and he told me, "Sorry, that's not allowed!" Of course he was kidding...but it was funny. I think it may have surprised him because I have never missed an appointment unless I was out of town (or when he is on vacation) and technically, I will be/could be back in town in time...but I decided to skip out so I don't have to rush. He leaves for San Diego in a couple weeks for his annual family vacation and normally I wouldn't want to skip out because I'll miss at least a week (still not sure of his exact dates) and that gives us three sessions between now and then. At least I know he always takes that week.

Tonight I realized that I have been lying. Not intentionally and I don't even think I was aware of it until a couple hours ago. Today we were talking about my mom's attitude about food and how as much as I hate to admit it (literally) it does influence me and it DOES bug me. When I got home and was reading and processing stuff at the same time I realized that "bugs me" is a catch all and that it is more than that. The things she says really hurts me because it shows her lack of understanding and lack of WANTING to understand how damaging things like, "It's too early to eat." This was said at 11:00 AM or "It's too late to eat anything." Said at 7 PM and on and on and on. Maybe SHE needs to see Toni and Toni can tell her to shut up.

And, as I see the attention and $$ she lavishes on the DOG while I struggle to afford treament (i.e. she spent over $150 for a DOG STROLLER)...I want to ask her why in the &%%& did she even have me???

Back to "Normal"

VBS is over. Sunday morning the kids got up and sang. They lead the the first three worship songs and then got back up to sing the offertory. It was only 1/2 of them because of the holiday...but they didn't care and our congregation also didn't care at all. After church a few people came up and said that it was very obvious from the look on the kids' faces and their smiles while singing that they had a great time last week.

Last week, J couldn't come the last day because he was going to Yosemite with his family for the holiday. He is a friend of G...one of the active kids in our CM program. G's mom told me that J told his parents he didn't WANT to go to Yosemite...he wanted to come to the last day of VBS! That was very cool to hear.

I had about a 10 minute talk with my SP and he called the whole thing "wonderful" (whew!)and over the next months we are going to think about WHY we do VBS and after we figure that out...what will be our plan for next year. Do we do it in the evening? Do we provide transportation for the kids to get to their day camps so they can do 1/2 day with us and 1/2 there? Do we do our own day camp that week? Since all our walk-ups Googled "San Jose" and "VBS" and found us...how better do we use the Internet, etc. The thing that I LOVE is he and I are on the same page. I told him when I was at PDCM and Craig was talking about knowing the purpose of the programs we do...my first thought was we need to cancel VBS because I have NO CLUE why we do it! So, to hear my SP echo that was very affirming.

We also have the nursery pager system up and running!! Now all I have to do is spend this week in there really looking at the changes I want/need to make. I think the current Nursery/Toddler Room will be swapped with the old one and the current one will be like a "mother's room" where they can change diapers if need be, breast feed, etc. If we can get the service piped into the rooms then I think finding volunteers (we need to make a change in our current staff) will be a bit easier.

Still haven't heard from West Valley and I rty not to dwell...I have too much other stuff to do!