Friday, December 03, 2004

Fighting the Voices...

My dieitian goes on maternity leave the 16th so I will see her on the 15th and then not again until March. I have very mixed feelings about it. I did tell her I can check in with Rob and he won't let me starve to death so that's a plus!

Part of me wants to make sure I do well and get on track when I see her in March and part of me is now "free" to quit fighting to put food in my mouth at least once a day because there is no one to really watch that. It's not like I am losing weight or anything so who cares if I eat or not?

I know the thinking is not the best...but I think it is in reaction to all that is going on. My mother pretty much watches me like crazy these days and I haven't purged in going on three unless I start heading back to the YMCA and go nuts...I'll be OK.

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