Saturday, December 03, 2005

LOSER...

This is SO lame. But, I want a real Christmas tree in the worst way. But, I'll be lucky if I make it to my next paycheck (I'll have to cancel Rob and Toni next week I think). I normally don't care and haven't had a tree in ages, but I think that is why I want one. My mom is content with the rather cute fake one I bought her a gfew years ago...but I miss having a real one.

I know the solution, but I do look for other PT jobs and nothing has panned out and I really don't want to leave the job I'm in and really don't feel God is telling me to move on. My schedule (having to be at church on Sunday) really impacts people wanting to hire me...plus not ever having a "normal" job...ever.

Last night was the tree lighting at church. We have this huge tree on our front lawn and for the past 12 years it has been the SHPNA site for the neighborhood tree lighting. Two school choirs performed and one of our handbell choirs. Then they head outside for the lighting and then back inside for visits with Santa and cookies. Sweet event...but the way parents were treating their kids just made my heart break.

I try to stay focused on why we are even celebrating Christmas...but there is something absilutely shattered inside me...that has been shattering since October if I'm honest about it. The 1/2 hour exercise that Rob is having me do is proving to be as scary as I thought it would be and is going places that I have been trying to avoid. Fun, fun!

1 comment:

The Thief said...

I grew up with a real tree, but somewhere along there we switched. After college, a friend asked me to help him with his real tree... Imagine my surprise when I broke out in hives.

So we stick with our little artificial one. With no "Jonathan-proof" ornaments...