Sunday, February 15, 2004

Blogger Idol Week 5...PICTURE THIS

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Okay, I keep thinking I should write something different than what I have been writing in this weekly "Blogger Idol," but it always comes back to, "write what you know." So, in the midst of all the hard work I am attempting to do in therapy...here we go...

Picture this...a room at the Disneyland Hotel bungalows. I am seven years old. My grandmother tied another one on, but we seem safe and snug in our room. It is late at night. My grandmother suddenly wakes up and no longer remembers where we are or why we are there.

Picture this...I am watching the Friday night "Creature Feature" on television. My grandfather is in the guest room sleeping. The phone rings. It is the police. My mom was driving while drunk...could we come get her...AGAIN!

Picture this...a little girl is awakened by shouts and screams and glass breaking. She leaves her warm bed and heads out into the "family room." Her mom and grandmother are throwing glasses and ask trays and plates against the wall for God only knows why... They let her help.

Picture this...A girl is spending the night next door. He mother and current boy friend left her alone in the house to go to Clear Lake. Other girls from the block spend the night. They do what all girls do...stay up at night and giggle. Talk turns serious in the semi-darkness. One of the girls is a Christian and begings to talk about God. Curiosity is piqued and the next day they all go to church.

Picture this...the girl knows how God healed her neighbor's family and wants that for heself...to take away the pain from her mother's two suicide attempts (to that date...more later), her molestation, her own thoughts of ending it...

Picture this...Girls gets tired of the fight...often. She sits in her office (now an adult) and wonders if she can keep going...she knows God is there...but even with Him by her side...the fatigue and sorrow seem too much to bear.

Picture this...two times a week the girl sits on the floor with her therapist and his trusty stuffed dog Frederick trying to make sense out of all of this. Not thy "whys," cuz she gets the whole "rain falls on the just and unjust" thing...but the why of why she seems incapable of seeing things from a different perspective...which she "should" because she is a child od God.

Picture this...TBA...picture still being formed!

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