Saturday, October 09, 2004

I Want God to Open Up a Hole and TAKE Me!

AAAAAAAUUUUGGGGHHHHHH!!!!!!

I wish I had never been born. I wish I knew what God was thinking when He put me in this family because I can't figure it out to save my life.

Today's marginally OK dinner for my grandfather became a fight over my soon to be 35th B-day and where we are going to dinner. I don't get a chance to vote. I don't get to decide, I don't get a say at all. I was really hoping I could have a nice 35th B-day cuz that is one of those kinda milestoney type years...but it is going to be hell. My grandmother said she would give my mom $$ and she and i could go to one place and my g'ma and g'pa wouldgo where we went today.

I want to forget the day exists, I would for ONCE like for them to ask me what I might want to do...I'd like to take it all out of their hands and disappear for that weekend...but what little extra $$ I had has had to go for therapy.

I thought I was doing better...but I am such at the breaking point!

3 comments:

Anonymous said...

i would do anything to help you get out of that house. love you. please hold on. i'm glad you were born.
xoso renee

Katie said...

(((((Deneice))))) God DOES NOT MAKE MISTAKES.....you are on this earth for an important purpose!!!!

Katie said...

(((((Deneice))))) God DOES NOT MAKE MISTAKES.....you are on this earth for an important purpose!!!!