Thursday, August 18, 2005

Not Sure This Was a Great Idea...



I went back to the gym yesterday...I am trying to keep it an every other day so I don't go bonkers. The one thing that helps that is lack o' ipod. I may need to beark down and charge an ipod shuffle! But, I have the one card and really want to get it paid down...so we'll see.

Anyway, as I promised the trainer on Monday, I ate something before I went to the gym. It had to be something I was willing to eat and yet had some carbs so I wouldn't die after 20 minutes on the elleptical machine. So, I had a raspberry Nutri-Grain bar.

My goal is to one day go to the gym and have the express purpose NOT to be to burn 500 calories on the cardio equipment before I even hit the weight machines. Yesterday, I did 50 minutes of cardio and was happy I could do it on one Nutri-Grain bar.

I see Toni tomorrow and I know she is going to need me to reel myself in a little bit because she doesn't like me to do that much cardio on so little food. The problem is between the PCOS and the ED my metabolism is in the basement anyway and I am deluding myself that as I start dropping weight again I will ease up on the gym time (if it gets ridiculous). This is going to take 100% honesty with Toni to make this work and it's scary how the temptation to NOT mention the gym is there. I fgure Rob knows...she doesn't need to know. That, my friends, is a HUGE lie and one that I cannot and will not allow myself to buy into.

In other news...I am currently 11 months purge free and Sunday will be 10 months SI free!

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