I need out of here. I hate that I hate coming to work. It's not fair to the kids or their parents. I mean...I like the younger kids...but youth is my passion, it is where God has gifted me...it is where I feel I thrive and God will have to really do a lot of changing of my heart for me to feel otherwise. I have been back to work three weeks and it keeps getting worse!

If it weren't for the YS Forum, I would probably lose my mind.

Speaking of which, I was at my grandparent's house for a bit after church and my grandmother starts watching "Hunger Point." I REALLY wish she'd realize that when an ED movie comes on...she needs to change the channel. That one was on while I was at LIFE and it was like a car wreck. I couldn't change the channel and I "had" to watch. Keeley took the remote from my hand and asked me if I wanted her to turn the TV off. Anyway, tomorrow "For the Love of Nancy" is on and I am glad I won't be home and that I don't have any blank VHS tapes. I gave them all up to Rob before I left for AZ. I also gave him all my diet books, ED books, carb counters, etc. Pretty much the only thing I miss is that movie and "Wasted," but I am better off without them.

Some of the Sr. Highers leave for the backpacking trip tomorrow and then they leave for Ft. Apache, AZ on August 1st. I am a prayer partner for one of my guys and need to get his letters written this week. John is a HUGE D'backs fan so if I can find him something I want to get it for him. I bought all western themed stationary to write my notes with. He gives me a huge hug every Sunday which is awesome. I think Drew, his Jr. High bro would as well, but he's too shy. That kid really sprouted up while I was gone.

If God wants me here then I pray He closes the doors to the PT position because I don't want to jump into that job because I miss YM...I want to do it because that is the place God wants me to be. I would NOT be the "point man" which would be good for me, great for my recovery and yet I would be doing what I do best. It's in His hands, though.

Okay, it is hot in my office...I came by to pick up my lap top so I will have it tomorrow in case the Assoc. Pastor answers my email! I am outta here 'til Tuesday!