I wish I knew what the heck is going on. Last night I actually took my "normal" sleep meds which took was longer to work than normal...but they did work and that's the important thing. So, I actually feel pretty well rested.

However, my anxiety level is going through the roof and that I can't explain. Maybe it's going to see Rob today, maybe it's seeing Dr. Oba...but I am really close to having a panic attack and I am trying to stay grounded at not let myself fall into it. It started on the drive over here. Of course I left my Seroquel at home....geesh...

I was looking at the YS job bank and Saratoga Pres is looking for a PT youth worker and they specifically want a female. Wouldn't that be awesome? I just know it is way too soon and that there is no way I could do that right now. Maybe, if they still need someone in a month or two...

Augh...I don't want to have to go home and get the meds...but...okay, I cannot depend on Seroquel forever...I used to get along great without it. Then again, I was numb...can't quite have a paanic attack if you are numb!

Maybe I'll be back later