The server is still down which is a royal pain...but maybe I will go and work at my mom's house after staff meeting to do what I need to do on the Internet.

I had a lot of nightmares last night...more just weird dreams and abuse flashbacks. I tell ya...when a 12 year old is not ready for a 40+ year old man to shove his tongue down your throat (ewwww.....) among other things...it's enough to still gross you out 21 years later. I feel like such damaged goods. I can hold hands, I can hug and cuddle...but then it starts getting scary...not that any of it has been an issue in a few years because it's not like I have been on date in ages...but still.

It makes me very thankful to have a therapist like Rob where I know I am safe in his embrace...same with my chiropractor in southern CA. But, at the end of our sessions, Rob's hugs make me feel very safe and I think continue to reassure me that he is not going anywhere. I think it is becoming less of an issue with me. We are close to hitting a milestone and I think once I hit a year with him in November many of the "he's gonna leave/he's gonna terminate me" fears will be permanently quelled. Three more weeks until the 11 month mark and just the next week I believe will put him as the longest I have had the same therapist. Sounds weird...but I am excited about it!

Kim and I went to see "The Fighting Temptations" last night. It was a really good movie. I'd see it again and I want the soundtrack. I may get it today since it is payday!

Packing is going pretty well. I am taking my stuffed animals to my mom's house today and two of my golding bookshelves and then Saturday I will take over another load of stuff and just try to get to the bare minimum of what I need at my place. I just want to get it over and done with!