Saturday, October 11, 2003
I don't know what I did to mess this up...but I did!

Grrrr....

My grandfather is sooooo sore. He could barely walk and couldn't even pick up Mikey (the dog) to take him for his daily drive. He still refuses to do anything about it. But, I have a feeling one day next week...off to Cameron we go. Cameron is Dr. Oba...we all go to him. I actually went to high school with him so in my case it has been a HUGE blessing to have a doctor I can trust with all the ED/SI garbage.

But, he loved my chili and the cake and his new 49er T-shirt so he had a good birthday. The man is diabetic and has never taken great care of that and he may be 69...but he is beginning to seem a heck of a lot older. It scares me. He is the most stable thing (other than God) in my life and in my mom's and grandmother's as well. She couldn't have asked for a better 2nd husband an considering all the ^&%$^ she has put him through...the fact he has been committed to her for 31 years is a miracle. I think a lot of that has to do with my mom and I though.

Anyway, I have something to toss in Rob's face on Monday. I keep trying to tell him what haappened when I was 12 was my fault...that I acted inappropriately. Rob asked me Thursday if I was naive and 12...hell...I am naive at 33. So, I tossed the basics out there and got confirmation that my actions were inappropriate.

I am at my mom's with another load of stuff. This is going really slow...I just want the move to be over at this point. I want a lot of things to be over at this point...but God and I seem to disagree on this point!